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| Intimacy plus 2005, November 24 - 11:58 a.m.
My birthday is in nine days! Yay! And my Winter vacation got approved so now my plans for a Carribean holiday are in place. Excellent. I've been thinking about intimacy today. Just, all the different levels there can be. I feel really intimate with Ross now, but then I felt really intimate with him half a year ago and it's only grown since then. I was thinking about how at first just how much I was able to say to him was amazing. I could tell him all the stuff in my life and my past. Then I was able to tell him all the silly things I do and think that I don't tell hardly anyone. He heard my horrible singing voice and heard my embarrasing moments. Then all my deep secrets came out, the sort of things I had vowed never to tell a soul. He saw me cry, he's seen me grieve, we've fought and made up, and he's seen my PMS-induced state. Then, since it was bound to happen, all the bodily intimacy caught up, which is truly the strength test of love and attraction. He's heard (and smelled... ugh) all the horrible gas, the rumbles of indigestion, and (to my dismay) has learned of various colon/rectal/bowel related problems I've had this year. I've vomitted on him while he held a bucket for me and then he emptied and washed the bucket. He's seen me sick, unbathed and smelly. And he still loves me and he still finds me attractive. I won't go into all the stuff I know about/experienced/learned from him because only my embarrassing things should be written about in here, but it's all basically the same and he's still hot to me and I love him. And it makes me wonder what deeper levels of intimacy there could be. I'm going to live with him in less than half a year. I suppose I will find out. Sidenote: He brought home these horrible, horrible art pieces yesterday. They look horns that were ripped off a deranged zombie unicorn. I hope he's not too attached to them. Thank You - 2006, June 7
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