I saw Passion of the Christ yesterday. Oh my God... Really.

I have much praise and some criticisms...

I don't think the inclusion of Satan was necessary. It was done in a kind of 'he walks among us' kind of way and several parts creeped me out. I also wish there were more flashbacks on Jesus' life and teachings than there were. There were some and they did nicely, but it would have really raised the bar if there had been more.

A) to really get across what had happened and

B) to break up some of the violence so it would be a bit easier to watch.

I know that he died a terrible way. First beaten to near death then crucified. I mean, it's my understanding that most didn't suffer both horrid beatings and then crucifixion. It was one or the other and both are just awful. It was supposed to take days for someone to die on the cross, but after the lashing and beating Christ took it took only hours.

Frankly, if the level of beatings against him that I saw were accurate, I'm surprised he lasted to be crucified at all. I wouldn't have.

As for the anti-jewish message that I have been hearing about... I didn't see it. There were the rabbis who wanted him dead and that is a historical fact. He threatened their temple. I saw jews wanting him dead but they were jews who wanted him dead and sided with the temple.

But, it was the Romans who killed him, beat him and crowned him with thorns. It was they who nailed him down and spat on him. and as they kicked him through the village to the hilltop, there were jews crying for him and begging for him to be let go.

With any controversial, figure, there will always be some who support and/or hate him or her. There were jews who wanted him dead because they thought he was a blasphemer and jews who wanted him released because they said he was a holy man.

Further, Pilate didn't have a ethical crisis, he was concerned because if there was a riot in Jesus's name, he would get in deep shit. He knew a riot could occur if Jesus was or even if he wasn't put to death. I think there was a lot of sore feelings over nothing. Jesus' community of jewish people didn't just sit back and do and feel nothing over his arrest. To suggest that they would only feel one way is foolish. People are diverse that way.

Now, I cried during this movie. Four separate times and that doesn't include the times I was close to tears. I have read the gospels, particularly Luke's (Because I think Matthew is a misogynist bastard) and John's. I don't know them by heart or anything and most of the reading was done when I was younger but I knew all the stations of the cross.

But to actually see it... That triggered not a new respect but a forgotten respect. As a child I heard it and thought, "Wow."

Then I got older and I still had a place for him in my heart and my life and I respected his teachings. But the way he died was not of great consequence to me. I knew he was a martyr for his cause and I liked that.

But to follow a path of life, to fight for a cause, to follow a destiny that is so difficult and knowing all along you would suffer a horrible death for it. It made me cry.

And seeing Mary made me cry. And seeing the thief beside him made me cry and seeing Simon assist the man he barely knew and then the despair he felt when he had to leave him made me cry.

You can read the gospels and if his story and his humanity touch you then that's something to carry with you. But not everyone can read and visualize the gospels, particularly with the language that is used. It's like reading Shakepeare.

All you get in the gosels is what happened and what was said in a very flowery way that can be hard to understand.

Having an actor show expressions in his face and seeing him remember his life and then truly witnessing the passion he had for what he was doing, for me was more effective than reading. I needed to see emotions, not just read words about what was said and who did what. Perhaps the original gospels had more emotion, but my english-translated gospels do not.

Passion of the Christ didn't renew my faith, because my faith was with me when I walked into the movie. But for the first time in a long while, his story touched me very deeply. I don't think I'll forget this movie.

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