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| A Grey Wedding 2001, October 16 - 1:03 p.m.
So today in painting class I felt great. We had our evaluations today and what that means at this point is telling us if we're on the right track. In drawing I have a C+ which is average or slightly above average at this point, which is encouraging. In painting, I don't know. I just know that I'm doing well enough. Eric (instructor) did tell me that my painting is coming along well. Basically I have a good start and should try not to rush it and ruin my hard work. I will try not to, but I have a horrible habbit of racing through my work like that. So a few nights ago I had a dream. I got married to Brent only he didn't show up. The dream is a little strange you see. Even though he didn't show up I still had to go through with the ceremony and was legally married to him. It was a sad little excuse for a wedding, my dress was mid-calf length and fairly plain, my flowers were pitiful and the small church was half empty. Not to mention, there was no groom. The reception was held in a room that resembled a funeral parlour that I have been in before. There were a few megar seats and some people dancing on the dark carpet floor. I didn't see a DJ or band anywhere. My father wanted the first dance with the bride but I said that I had to wait for Brent because he was the groom. He wasn't anywhere to be found. Now it gets weirder. Brent's family threw a separate wedding ceremony where I was in a grand church with a flowing dress and I had to participate in that one too, but there was still no Brent. Keep in mind that in my dream it made more sense. As for the HoneyMoon, I can't tell you much about that because all I can recall is that I had to meet him there and it wasn't anywhere great and only for a week or less. In my dream I could remember dreading married life because of the crappy memories that were captured from my wedding. That was all I could remember when I woke up and I felt very cheated. I was quite relieved when I realized it was just a dream and I didn't actually get married so young with such a terrible ceremony. I'm a firm believer in starting things right. A man should propose with a ring and in a romantic way. If he can't afford a ring of any kind then perhaps he isn't financially ready to get married yet. If he can't do it romantically, then he shouldn't do it at all! A proposal is such a romantic moment in a woman's life and the man she loves shouldn't ruin it for her by being cheap or lazy. Just how I feel of course. Maybe other women feel differently. Anyhow, that dream I had was offensive to these views even if it was interesting. Thank You - 2006, June 7
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